There are some phrases, and the word Talaq is such a Kalam that it is clearcut in meaning, it is Sareeh, and it is easily understood, irregardless of whatever intention is in the heart, when a husband pronounces these words to his wife, he has divorced her, and later on the husband expresses regret, and expresses pain at expressing such life changing words in the fit of rage, reality sets in, he has divorced a woman he loves. Really the wife has done nothing to warrant such treatment, and so perhaps due to anxious attachment or a possible trauma bond, she is not ready to walk away from the relationship. Announcing talaq during an argument only highlights the level of abusive behaviour within the dynamic. It will take time to undo the trauma and the constraints of the web of control. If she takes the matter to any judge, he would find the case in her favor. He would allow her to walk away but the marks of abuse remain. I have helped women work through feelings of trauma, guilt, shame and learn new paths to finding their freedom. It has been a difficult journey for many and by being supportive we can help women realise their self worth.
The best way to avoid situations as the above, is by cultivating acts of mercy within the household, between husband and wife.
Prophetic practice and the Sunnah has demonstrated that men should prefer love, love always trumps hate. Men should develop attitudes of forgiveness, men should cultivate the best opinion of others, even if it doesn’t suit them, some of the greatest men of our time would still see the best in their adversaries.If men applied similar attitudes within their marriage and developed emotional management strategies, it would allow the arena for trust to thrive within their relationships with others